Joni James Aldrich and Neysa M. Peterson, RN, MS

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Dealing with “What Ifs” and “If Onlys”

We put our blinders on because the truth scares us so much we don’t want to see it or believe it. People have off days, especially when stress and pain are daily companions. We know that what we’re going through will change our world so catastrophically that we look away from the future.

In some ways, there are no more powerful words when used together than “what if” or “if only.” Both imply regret and a desire to go back and take a different path.

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Sylvia Nissenboim, LCSW

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A Closer Look at Our Caregiving Roadmap to Learn from the Experiences of Others Who Have Taken this Journey

January 17, 2011 Experts by Sylvia Nissenboim, LCSW

Louise is a 58-year-old single woman with a successful career as an executive manager.  She recently moved her parents to town so she could give her mother, who has Alzheimer’s disease, and her father, who has debilitating arthritis and hearing loss, the attention they need without having to travel 110 miles to get to them. Balancing work time with parent care time has become the challenge of her lifetime, yet she is committed to ensuring that her parents get the care they need.

Morris is an 80-year-old retiree, in the fifth year of his second marriage.  He had been married to Evelyn for 50 years until she died from cancer seven years ago.  In the last year, his wife, Joy, has been diagnosed with dementia, and Morris, who was finally experiencing strength and better health after his years of caring for Evelyn, is now facing another round of caregiving.  Joy’s children live nearby but all but one have been somewhat estranged for years.

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